What is the point of…

Smiling too much to be Victor Meldrew

What people do with their bodies and their lives is entirely a matter for them – I am not in the business of dictating what other people do – but what exactly is the point of:

1. tattoos (other than as a form of self-mutilation)?
2. piercings (other than as a form of self-mutiliation)?
3. Formula 1 racing (I can see the point of it from the point of view of the manufacturers but why do people pay good money to watch other than – like ice skating – waiting for someone to have an accident)?
4. Marmite? 
5. Excessive food packaging that you cannot open?
6. Young men wearing their trousers around their knees?  (Other than as a means of slowing them down  if fleeing from the police.)
7. Lots of food programmes?  (Cheap to produce I know, but what’s the point?)
You  get the drift.  Feel free to add to the list.  I probably will.

About Lord Norton

Professor of Government at Hull University, and Member of the House of Lords
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9 Responses to What is the point of…

  1. Peta says:

    What is the point of…

    The War on Drugs
    Denying cannabis to MS sufferers

    Answers on a postcard please. . . . .

  2. Ross Picton says:

    Lord Norton, I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with you quite so much.

  3. Tom says:

    what is the point in a party proclaiming to be conservative in nature, thus favoring an inclination to conserve the status quo and only partake in a programme of change when absolutely necessary, yet when said party are elected to government and various members gain office, those in office partake a serious of revolutions in government that are anything but against the nature to conserve.

  4. Len says:

    RE number 3 – I think you may have just hit the nail on the head there!

  5. ladytizzy says:

    No idea on (1), (2) , (3) and (6)

    (4) It helps identify tourists and ex-pats. However, Denmark has created a bigger hell-storm than publishing a cartoon of a prophet by banning the importation of Marmite. This is due to an EU regulation on stuff with added vitamins but it will be a brave gvt that follows our Danish friends.

    (5) So supermarkets can reduce the amount at a later date, leading to gratitude from consumers and piety within gvt. (See following post for a jaw-dropping article on how one council is ‘encouraging’ recycling.)

    (7) To allow people to see what can be done with food rather than whatever is experienced at a Tesco’s store.

  6. ladytizzy says:

    The Guardian, 6 June:

    The day started like any other when, just before seven, a loud noise came from outside my flat, the sound of wheelie bins being shunted aside. Living as I do in one of the less salubrious parts of south London, where bin foraging for things such as bank statements is commonplace, I went to investigate, and was surprised to see someone scuttling down the road with a clinking bag of my recycling by his side. I gave chase – mainly out of bewilderment.

    The chap – whom I vaguely recognised as a neighbour – explained that he had that week received a warning from Lambeth council saying they were of the opinion that he was not producing enough compulsory recycling and that he was in line for a fine, and so he was “borrowing” my recycling to give the impression that they were mistaken. As I halved my bag with him (to be honest, I was happy to reduce the embarrassment of empties), I thought: has it really come to this?

    Lambeth, like most other London boroughs, brought in compulsory recycling in April in the hope of raising recycling levels by 8% and saving £400,000. Ignore it, and you get a football-style yellow card, then a red, and then, ominously, a “face-to-face visit to overcome communication problems”. Ultimately, non-recyclers can be fined up to £1,000. The first yellow cards have now gone out, making my neighbour twitchy.

    But how can you police a situation where one can sidestep punishment simply by carrying someone else’s recycling 20 yards down the road? Either we invent a new offence of Theft Of Jacob’s Creek Empties For Fraudulent Means or, mark my words, society will fall.
    Definitely worthy of a “Where to start?” .

  7. ladytizzy says:

    1) Hairdresser’s holding a mirror, insisting clients see the back of their head.

    2) Neck ties.

    3) Processionary caterpillars.

    4) Unique fingerprints, sinuses, and an appendix. What was God’s thinking?

    5) Shiny loo paper

    6) Serving suggestions on instant meal packages that merely reflect the contents with a single sprig of parsley artfully posing for the photo. In fact, such garnishes in general.

    7) Dentists.

  8. maldencapell says:

    What is the point of…electing the House of Lords.

  9. The Duke of Waltham says:

    Regarding 1) and 2), self-mutilation is exactly the point. Covering one’s body in tattoos is painful, ergo it shows that a young man is not only healthy and strong enough to survive in a dangerous world but can incur the extra cost of self-mutilation. It is an evolutionary means of advertising one’s fitness to the opposite sex. A modern example of the so-called “handicap principle” is conspicuous consumption: by wasting a fortune on useless but expensive luxuries, one shows one’s possession of even more money. Consumerism wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for this.

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